Experience: Discovering a new life after recommitment.
I want to do this, but I’m unsure of what to say.
What shall I do? Where should I go?
Is there a guideline to my actions?
Where do I find the words?
I need answers and you’re staring at me in disbelief.
I don’t already know. This is a new journey for me.
Please don’t tell me I’m alone in this.
Please don’t tell me…it’s just me.
Desire is knocking at my door and my heart is weak.
I want to accept its call and cure this itch creeping into my soul.
But I’m not sure of what to do. Can I ignore the call?
Are you there?
Can you hear me?
Why is silence all I hear around me?
My life is not perfect, but it’s MY life.
It’s full of lessons, trials, joy, tribulations, grief, adventure, sadness, confusion, pain and so much more.
I have tested murky waters with the tip of my toe, and other days I have swam in the deep end.
I have loved the wrong people, and shunned the right people.
I have jumped into black pits of misery, and I have climbed the tallest ladders to joy.
I have laid eyes on beauty rival of my wildest dreams, and breathed in air so pure – life seemed like a dream.
I have learned that good doesn’t always mean right, and pain always equals hope.
Perseverance and I are on a first name basis, but history seems to always repeat itself.
I have eaten the forbidden fruit, and let the sweet nectar blind my eyes from all that is good.
I have ungratefully escaped death’s grip; and foolishly tested him as well.
I have received love to rival the most infamous heroines, but it never seems to outweigh the black love the penetrates your mind and body.
I shouldn’t be writing this today, but I’m here. Why?
Because of Him.